Steps to and through sex--inte


Steps To and Through Sex



Sex. A three letter word that contains about 3000 intonations, thoughts, worries, and considerations. There are many considerations and discussions to be made when having a sexual relationship with a partner. The main ingredient of a successful and satisfying sexual relationship is good communication (Andresen, Weinhold 1981). Communication means, literally, the experience of community or unity (Lear 1997). It is contact and it is connection. You must establish a high quality of connections with yourself and your partner in order to experience unity through sex (Gordon 1980). If you don't establish the rules of the relationship, negotiate condom use, and talk about what will happen if the female gets pregnant, or if one of you has contracted an STD, the people in the relationship are neither mature enough nor ready to go to the next step and become sexually active with one another.

There are two types of sexual relationships. There is the "casual sex" relationship and the "committed sex" relationship (Cootie & Schaeffer 1998). Casual sex usually happens when a person goes to a bar and goes home with someone they have just met that night. There is no talk of whether they are going to use a condom, whether or not someone has a sexually transmitted disease, or what will happen if the female gets pregnant. Chances are, phone numbers or last names will not even be exchanged. This type of sexual relationship is extremely dangerous and not smart at all. One night stands are an extremely common occurrence, although it is sad to say. It is this type of behavior that leads to the spread of AIDS, herpes, and other diseases(Lear 1997).

The other type of relationship involving sexual activity is the type where two people have been in a committed relationship before they engage in sexual activity. In a romantic relationship, a couple may date for as much as a year before sexual activity occurs (Lear 1997). In most cases, the couple has established a trust for one another, and knows each other's sexual history. The relationship is usually monogamous, with them dating only one another. Things, such as the rules of the relationship, how sex may effect the relationship, and what will happen if pregnancy occurs are discussed before the act takes place (Henley & Thorne 1975). This is the responsible way to handle a sexual relationship. People in a relationship should be both comfortable enough and serious enough with each other to be able to discuss such an important topic.

A major question that comes up in a relationship is "What if the female gets pregnant?" A couple should be stable enough in their relationship to be able to handle an unwanted pregnancy. Whether they decide to make the relationship more involved by getting married, or whether they are going to even have the child. In a casual relationship, the female does not have the luxury of discussing what to do with her partner; she is basically on her own either to raise the child in a single parent household or to abort the fetus. That is a huge weight to have on two sets of shoulders, much less one. At least in a romantic relationship, there are two people to handle the "accidents" and deal with it accordingly.

A sexual relationship is an important thing. It is not something to be taken lightly. Having sex is a major step to take in a relationship. A couple should be both physically and emotionally able to have a sex. Sex should not be just "sex," but it should be making love. There should be not only physical but emotional ties in a relationship before making love enters the picture.

I was raised to believe that sexual relations were not simply sex, but lovemaking. To this day, I believe that is how it should be. Instilled at an early age, I learned that my body is something to be cherished, not thrown around as though I am not proud of it and myself. In keeping with the values my parents, mainly my mother, taught me, I waited until I found the right person to make love with for the first time.

Before my girlfriend and I actually began having a sexual ...